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My couch understands my language

by Agnieszka Laherto

What is your problem’s colour…..shape……texture……or sound? Is it still like a sea or big like a distant mountain peak? If it has the structure of a motor engine, which particular part would you need to fix?

These questions reflect my regular thinking process. At once I know how certain issues make me feel and how they would look once they become more tangible. I can describe them using each of the 5 senses, even taste. However, it can be a struggle for me to express them in a regular, conversational way.

Two years ago, I started working with a coach who has supported me through a very challenging period in my life. When we met, I was in the process of building my own company, coming back to the market after maternity leave and, inevitably, dealing with imposter syndrome. All this was compounded by having to recover from burnout after my previous role.

Straight away my coach noticed I had a different approach to thinking. Even though my world of visuals was different to what her other clients explored in their coaching sessions, she never made me feel odd because of my different perspective. More than that, I have always had the impression that she totally understands me and follows my process of thinking. She has given me freedom of expression, which has resulted in me being very comfortable with my thinking.

Thanks to her letting me be myself, our sessions have been extremely insightful with a lot of “eureka moments” achieved in a relatively short period of time. Almost immediately we were able to build a great coach-coachee relationship built on mutual trust and respect.

Sessions with my coach have been like spa treatments for my brain. They have really changed the way I feel afterwards. Coaching has helped me to step back to see the bigger picture on issues I brought with me to the sessions. I have a feeling of growth and I can see I keep on developing my skills. My coach has helped me better understand certain issues; I have become more aware of my perceptions, habits and beliefs as well as behaviours, values and my identity. I have better clarity of thinking; I keep on challenging myself to try to do some things differently than I normally would do. I am much more able to step out from my comfort zone to achieve better results.

Undeniably, my coach has helped me to become a better coach myself, which I am very grateful for.

One of the greatest learnings for me from the experience is realizing that, whilst we all have different ways of thinking, there is always a way to find a language of mutual understanding. It needs to be built on respect, trust and acceptance of differences as that’s one of the most beautiful aspects of all us – being individuals.

Picture source: unsplash.com, taken by: Aditya Wardhana 

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